Hijab on!

Hijab on!

Following the international hijab day, I’ve been really thinking about the hijab and how it is interpreted around the world, and I have noticed it a lot more everywhere, but not in the usually expected places.

The first thing to clarify, is that a hijab is nothing else but a scarf worn around the head. It seems people tend to think it has to be specifically one size or one shape. You can wear any sort of scarf.

Well this is funny, just as I was typing the sentence above, my neighbour came in to ask my husband for help with a blown fuse. I am still wearing my scarf from prayer and so he said

‘ oh I like your… what do you call it? ‘

 I replied ‘Headcarf’

‘Headscarf really? It’s not got another name…?’

‘Yeah, headscarf, hijab, however you want to call it’

Talk about good timing, right?

So anyway, headscarves have increasingly been associated with extremism, oppression and intolerance. So I wanted to make a point with a few pictures.

 

What is your first though when seeing this young lady? Terrorist?

And how about this beautiful soul? A women oppressed by her husband?

 

Humm.. And this woman, surely she is one of those who doesn’t how beautiful it is to be a woman, covering herself like that.

And these three, what are they? Covered in bin bags ?

I mean poor poor women, not educated, not allowed to speak or to even work?

How about this one? Stuck at home all day cooking and cleaning right?

And her?

And her?

I think you are can see my point now.

Covering your head is only ever seen as a sign of oppression and extremism when related to Islam, when women from around the world, throughout history and with different fashions have covered their heads and been giving any grief for it.

There needs to be more tolerance towards those choosing modesty as a fashion. The media must take on that now, enough of showing us skimpy pictures only, most women in the UK don’t want to wear skimpy clothes.

Stop trying to incite young ones to wear underwear in the street, seriously, you have to cater for all tastes if you are part of the media.

Well, I have to go and pray now, but I do hope to see a shift in fashion soon, last year maxi dresses were in fashion, which was great, but let’s hope that ladies who don’t like showing off too much skin can still be represented in fashion and media.  

Inspiring lives

Assalam Walaikum !

I don't know where you will be reading this from but as I am writing this, the snow has covered the London pavements with a thick blanket of white & soft fluff!
A child's' heaven! Snowmen, snow fights and snow angels are everywhere!!
While it is beautiful and a sign of God's greatness, SubhanAllah, the snow can be quite daunting for some, and for the elderly in particular.

******
Now, before I go on to talking about the inspiring sister I just met, I would like to invite you to think about the people you know, or you know of, that may live alone or in an isolated area and who could do with a helping hand in the adverse weather. This of course applies any time of the year, in any extreme weather. Call and see if they need any shopping done, check that their heaters (air-cons) are working or maybe just pop in for a chat.
******

So here's my story. For Muslimahs in South West London, there is a social network called SWMuslimah. It is mailing group really, were sisters can mass email information to all sisters in the South West of London.
It's really interesting to hear about conference and talks, things that are for sale, sisters asking for advice etc...

On Saturday night, one of the emails that came through was regarding an elderly revert sister, living very close to me, who was feeling slightly isolated because of the snow, and frightened after one of her neighbours passed away and was only found 2 weeks later.
Another sister had sent the email round to all of us asking if somebody could go and check on her while the weather was bad.

I immediately called the sister and arranged to go and visit her the next day.
I have to say, I was really really excited to go and meet this sister. I love meeting reverts, and I love meeting new people, and I love feeling helpful, but above everything else, I miss my grandparents.
With one of them living in Scotland and the others in France, I rarely get to see them in person and can only count on telephone conversations to check on them. So setting off to visiting this sister, only a year older than my own grandmother, made me feel like I was going to see my own grandma.
What really had got me in the email was the mention that her sons had cut off all ties with her since she had come into the deen. I couldn't even begin to imagine the sadness in her heart...

I was expecting to meet a fragile sister, who would need help with things around her house, but Mashallah, I was surprised to find a high spirited and smiley sister, and a double surprise to realise that I had met her more than once at Turning Point Academy!

My husband and I, (we went together) sat the whole afternoon with her, listening to story after story from her life. It was one of the most uplifting afternoons we'd had in a while.
This sister, despite her illnesses and her age, told us that she still volunteered, from home or in an office for various charities! Can you believe it Mashallah?

I was really inspired and in awe slightly for this sister who against all odds, has kept faith in her heart and a smile on her face, while reaching out to others all along.

As we were about to leave another sister called to say she was in the neighbourhood and was going to pop in.

When I checked on her today, she told me that she'd had an excellent day and that 3 more sisters had come that evening to visit her.

I hope that this story made you smile, Inshallah, and also made you think of one person you could turn too and help this winter!

Salam Walaikum sisters!!

Dawah in Islam

Assalam Walaikum sisters!

Since January started, Alhamdulillah, I have managed to keep my 5 a day!
5 prayers that is - not fruit- unfortunately, that still needs improvement.

I cannot believe it to be honest. 9 days in a row of praying 5 times a day, when I used to find it difficult to pray even just once a day, every day!

Subhannallah, it shows what you can achieve when you do things in the name of Allah.

The decision was mine to make, there was no pressure from my peers, from my sisters, from my parents- most definitely not from my parents in my case!- not from my husband or in laws.

No, I decided that this was the step I needed to take to please God.

Faith should be just that, a relationship between the individual and God. I find it really sad that, around the world, and throughout the ages, religion has been imposed on others.
As Muslims, we should learn what Dawah is, but we should also know to leave matters to Allah once we have done what is in our power to invite others into Islam.
Especially true when you talk to new Muslims or non-Muslims. A lot of us westerners do not like to be told what to do or what to believe in.

I believe I can invite people to Islam better by showing a kind and understanding character rather than by trying to endlessly convince them by lecturing them.

That of course is my personal opinion. What do you think sisters? Let me know if you think differently...

Salams

2013 Resolutions

Assalam Walaikum!

The dawn of 2013 is approaching, Inshallah!

While many Muslims around the world do not adhere to taking resolutions for the new year as it is based on the Christian calendar, it is a tradition that many of us reverts have practiced prior to Islam.

I will be making a resolution this year, as I did last year and I will explain to you the reasoning behind this.

In the country we live in, the new year is also a synonym of winter, a time where everything has been stripped down, ready to come back to life.
We, humans, subhannallah, have been created by Allah, like plants and animals, like the sky and the sea and everything else around us. We live in sync with the world around us. It is the science behind the faith, mashallah.
Our bodies are ready for new beginnings in spring, our minds feel hopeful, we often feel more positive and more creative at that time of the year for that reason. Allah has given us seasons, and we must appreciate them all for how they affect us.

I feel that taking resolutions can be helpful if they are linked to our deen, inshallah.

So let me tell you a story, my story.
On the 1st of January  2011, I took a resolution. I told myself that this was the year I would convert to Islam. On the 12th of June 2011, I took my shahada at Tooting Mosque. A week later, my fiancé and I had taken our Nikkah.
On the 1st of January 2012, I decided to eat hallal meat only. That was a difficult part of my convertion, but mashallah, I managed to stick to it, with the help of Allah's kindest and guidance.
On the 1st of January 2013, Inshallah, I will start doing my 5 daily prayers.

For reverts it is important to keep improving our deen at the speed which is right for us. Rushing ourselves when we aren't ready may take us away from the deen. Some sisters mashallah, manage to change all these things at once, others may take months, or years.

I make duah for all of my sisters to have a wonderful year 2013, filled with happiness, prosperity, health, wealth, learning, and most importantly with the beauty of the deen. Ameen.

Salaams!

xx

Can I be a practising Muslimah and have a career, here in the UK?

Assalam Walaikum sisters!

I've been thinking about the subject of work recently, as a Muslim, as a revert and as a British woman.

I got made redundant last month. After months of feeling financially unsafe and of work becoming more and more uncertain for 2013, my boss did what she had to do, and let go of some of her staff. That meant me.

I didn't feel that upset, to be honest, mashallah. I saw this sudden change as a blessing. For well over a year now, I had been thinking of a career change. I wanted something that allowed me to practice my faith, keep to my values, yet allow my creativity to be expressed.

I am seeing this as a sign of encouragement from Allah, subhannallah, to be brave and push myself to aim higher and gain greater achievements.

Although I am still unsure which direction to take, I have had some ideas.
But actually it isn't an easy and straight forward decision for reverts to Islam. There are many things to consider that we would not have had to think about before.

Will I be able to pray? Will I be working in a Hallal environment? Will I be ok to wear my headscarf there? Will I be regarded as good as any other employee?

To add to the equation, I have only ever worked and wanted to work in the media. How can I combine all of this together?

Inshallah.... That is the only Duah that comes to my mind.

We can sit and fret and worry, or we can leave it to the hands of Allah. It is quite a difficult thing to do, and further more difficult thing to explain to our families, being non- muslims, often non believers. They want us to succeed and cannot comprehend such as 'laid-back' attitude as they would see it.

But it isn't about being laid back, we will have to job search, apply for jobs, go to dozens of interviews. It is the outcome of all of these which we leave upon Allah to guide us with.

What I have noticed about a lot of sisters I have met over the past 2 years is an incredible sense of entrepreneurship. Mashallah.

Well, thinking about it, starting your own business that you can run from home is probably the easiest way to work as a muslimah. You chose your hours, you can pray when you want to, you keep to your principles and you do not have to worry about wearing your hijab or niqab. SubhanAllah.

And the Prophets' own wife (saw), Khadijah, is one of the most inspiring people to look up to in that prospect. She was a business woman of her own right, she ran her own business and was very successful, mashallah.

Inshallah, my next post will be about her and how we can aspire to be more like her Inshallah.

Back to blogging

Assalam Walaikum sisters!

Things have seems to go back to a normal rythm, two months after our wedding and so I am 100% ready to take on the blogging again.

Follow me on Twitter @RevertDiaries for daily quotes, fashion inspiration and crafty ideas!

I am also on Pose, the fashion app that allows you to upload pictures of outfits and of inspiring fashion. Follow me there under therevertdiaries.

I look forward to lots of articles and inspiring times!!

I would be interested in hearing your stories of how this Christmas season went for you as a revert to Islam, especially if this was your first one as a Muslim, inshallah.

May Allah bless you all sisters!!

x

Christmas Period

Salam.

Here is a very interesting and supportive message from Solace.

XMAS AND NEW YEAR SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR REVERTS!

on Saturday, 15 December 2012. Posted in New Muslims

Assalamu alaikum

This time is a very difficult time for reverts regardless of whether they have been Muslim for 1 week or 15 years! SOLACE acknowledges and understands that it is at this time of the year that many sisters feel lonely and a deep sense of possibly family loss. SOLACE has sought the advice of a few revert sisters and we would like to share some tips for surviving the Xmas and New Year season.

PLEASE FORWARD THIS EMAIL TO AS MANY REVERTS THAT YOU KNOW.

* Remember you have been on a spiritual journey which they haven't shared. Therefore changes which come from the heart for the revert, such as no longer celebrating non Muslim festivals, are shocking to a family who usually just see the do's and don'ts of Islam, and not the spiritual side. It's important to be sensitive to the family and as open as possible. Share with them your reasons for the changes in your approach, and perhaps warn them before these changes happen.

* Give gifts to your relatives at both Eids, just as they want to give your family gifts at both birthdays and Christmas. In this way all the family, especially the children, don't miss out and everyone can learn from each other. You can always save the gifts for Eid if you prefer, just as they may save your gifts for Christmas! Alternatively, ask them to buy the children winter presents at the beginning or middle of December but not near the day itself.

* Remember to call them on the days around Christmas - they'll be missing you, and by spending time asking them about their day, you are showing an interest in their lives, just as you want them to show an interest in yours. Be open to chatting about their preparations and plans so they don't feel you've changed beyond all recognition, but just be gentle and firm in your own beliefs. At the end of the day, you can't just pretend its not happening.

* If you don't want to be with family over Christmas, try to visit them at some point earlier or later on in December. If you want to visit on the day, don't participate in the Christmas lunch and giving of presents, but make it in the evening after everything is over. This may keep both yourselves and your family happy, whilst standing clear of the ritual Christmas activities. And during the time you do spend with them inside the house, try to look good! They need to see that although their daughter covers herself fully, she can still take pride in her appearance. Take pretty clothes when you go to visit, wear a coloured scarf if you normally wear black, etc. It can really make a difference to them.

* If you're struggling yourself with feelings of emptiness, being apart on the day when all the family used to be together, make alternative plans. Keep busy during these times. Utilise the events that often go on in the mosques such as special talks at this time of year. Have a day out, as the roads are generally clear, and parking is free. Just make sure that parks etc are open, otherwise the children may end up disappointed. Visit a large mosque in a city some distance away that you wouldn't usually get to visit, or go natural - beaches and forests are always open!

* If you decide to stay at home, have a family Halaqa or invite other sisters round, especially the revert sisters you know - and take time together to study about Prophet Isa (a.s) in detail, developing a love and renewed understanding of his life as a Prophet. Go back to the Qur'an and Sunnah, and teach the children that Islam stands out as the One true religion, and is something to be proud of. Finally, spend more time on your prayer mat, praying for your non-Muslim family to come to Islam.

* If you're still a part of their family time in some small way, without celebrating Christmas itself, then maybe your family will feel more interested in joining you on one of your Eid days, thereby opening up Islam in a new way to them. So without overstepping the boundaries of Islam, aim to see your gentle and generous approach at their time of year as a means of Daw'ah.

Wasalamu alaikum

SOLACE

www.solaceuk.org

The Fashion Edit: 12-09-12

Salam sisters!!

This fashion edit is a short one, I put together an outfit which I wanted to share as I really loved it and made from all clothing articles I owned prior to reverting!


I like mixing trends and clashing textures, so for this one I mixed lace with leopard print. To keep it quite soft, I stayed in neutral colours.

The top is lace, and though this one is from China, you can buy lace tops in every shop at the moment. Primark have some really nice ones.

The cardigan is from my mum actually, but again, this you can find in a lot of stores. What I like about it is that it covers the arms but reveals what you are wearing underneath, so it works great with T-shirts and tops with details on them.

The leopard print scarves are everywhere at the moment too, I saw some cool scarves today in Rocket and in TK Max.

The pictures do not show this very well but I am wearing beige palazzo trousers with the outfit. The belt is actually from the trousers, but I chose to wear it on the hips to shape the silhouette slightly. This is a question of shape and of taste.
 Sisters who wish not to show any form of shape would do well with this top otherwise, as it tight on the shoulders but wide everywhere else, making it less likely to make you look drowned.



I really liked how I tied the scarf as well... but not sure if I could do it again if I tried. It was really light and perfect for the lingering summer heat we are having this september.

Let me know what you think of it !!

xx

Salams!

The Fashion Edit: Accessorising your hijab

Assalam Walaikum sisters!

Today I wanted to upload a little idea I had a few months back. I have a lot of necklaces, when I say a lot, I mean a lot! But with wearing the headscarf, not that many are being seen or used anymore, so I've started wearing them on my headscarf!

Here's how to accessorise your hijab with a necklace: 

You will need :
Some curby grips and crocodile grips
A plain head scarf
A short necklace.

I used the headscarf as an under-scarf as well as a hijab so Alhambdulillah, it wasn't too warm under there either.
First you grip your first layer (under-scarf) on to your hair. Then position the necklace so it fall on the forehead where it was disturb your vision. Make sure it won't disturb/distract you in prayer either. Grip it in place with the crocodile grip, grabbing some of the scarf with it. Then carry one wrapping the pashmina/scarf around your head as you would usually. Tadah!

I'll try with different scarves and different necklaces, inshallah, and let you see the styles we can achieve!
For Eid, I wore a pale pink scarf with a silvery necklace as ornament, it looked really nice.

Until then sisters!!

Dealing with abuse

As a revert, I guess it's something I expected at some point. I mean you hear stories of racism, parents denying their children, families being broken up... As a revert you just know that along with the blessings you receive, hardship is on its way!
You will encounter it, in some way or another and it is better to be prepared. For each bit of abuse received, ask Allah to help you and you will find strength.

A few minutes ago, I experienced my first verbal abuse. To be honest, in 1.5 years of being a Muslim it's surprising to have not been receiving this sooner.
A and I were on the bus after a nice evening out. I had a scarf loosely on my head, as I always do in the evenings. As we went to get off the bus, a woman yelled:
What the fu** has she got on her head? What does she think she s Indian or something?
I wasn't quite sure she was talking about me, but then I realised there was only us left on the bus.
Her and her other friends went off their way, not before screaming:
No matter how hard you try you ll never fit in anywhere! Or something along those lines.

By then I had picked up they were insulting me ( my brain chose to tune out the other stuff they were saying) I could really feel my temper rising. A just told me to keep walking and I started laughing.

Partly at their stupidity, partly because I didn't know what else to do. I wanted to talk back to them but that would have out me in danger ( they weren't the smallest or kindest looking people). In the end I felt shaky, A felt it was because they d seen me with him they d said that, but I think they just reacted that way because of fear, the fear of a phenomenon happening more and more in the UK: British girls are converting to Islam.

Allah somehow pushed us both home safe, we never talked back which we usually both would have, and it was best that way. Now I will pray that one of their loved ones converts. That will hopefully help them open up their minds to our beautiful faith and teach them a lesson in acceptance. I am shocked but not really upset. I did know this would come one day.

Subhanallah, God gave me strength to get past it safe, inshallah, I will carry on dealing with these things with wisdom.
Goodnight sisters, may Allah protect you all and make you impermeable to insults and abuse. Inshallah
Xx